Jokes!!!!!!

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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by Company_man on Sat Aug 15, 2009 7:20 am

Victoria Beckham and her driver were cruising along a country road one evening when a cow ran in front of the car. The driver tried to avoid it but couldn't - the cow was killed. Posh told her driver to go up to the farmhouse and explain to the owners what happened. About an hour later, the driver staggered back to the car with his clothes in disarray. He was holding a bottle of wine in one hand, a cigar in the other and smiling happily.
"What happened?" asked Posh .
"Well," the driver replied, "the farmer gave me the wine, his wife gave me the cigar, and their beautiful daughter made mad passionate love to me."
"My God, what did you tell them?" asked Posh.
The driver replied: "I'm Victoria Beckham's driver, and I just killed the cow."
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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by KingCon on Sat Aug 15, 2009 11:58 am

What Seas does a Banking Pirate sail on? The Economiccri-seas!

A Liverpudlian walks into a Welfair office and asks I've been offered a Blow-job will that affect my amount i get paid?

And the Worst joke award goes to me for the Pirate one. Thank you.
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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by Bil on Sat Aug 15, 2009 1:54 pm

A bear, alion and apig are sat down discussing which one of them is the most fierce.

The bear says " When i growl the whole forest is afraid of my power."

The lion says "Thats nothing, when i roar the entire jungle quivers with fear."

The pig burst into a fit of hysterical laughter "Thats nothing all i have to do is sneeze and the entire world shits itself."
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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by Company_man on Sun Aug 23, 2009 2:27 pm

A woman brings eight-year-old Johnny home and tells his mother that he was caught playing doctors and nurses with Mary, her eight-year-old daughter.

Johnny's mother says, "Let's not be too harsh on them.... they are bound to be curious about sex at that age."

"Curious about sex?" replies Mary's mother. "He's taken her fucking appendix out!"
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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by KingCon on Sun Aug 23, 2009 2:33 pm

Company_Man..... I've finally got to listen to some NAS. It was you right? Anyway if it was I'm not really a fan but I like two of his songs.

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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by Company_man on Mon Aug 24, 2009 10:42 am

Yeah it was mate lol
Thats alright mate,everyone to there own, what songs where they you liked?
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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by KingCon on Mon Aug 24, 2009 12:01 pm

I liked Hip hop is dead and I really like Got yourself a gun... Class song.

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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by Company_man on Mon Aug 24, 2009 12:05 pm

Yeah those are 2 awesome tracks

you like Dr Dre? I got his 2001 album playing at the moment..
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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by KingCon on Mon Aug 24, 2009 12:12 pm

Dre's probably the greatest rap producer of all time... Yeah I love 2001 Chronic... (Waiting for Detox) Whats your fav song on that album? Mines probably Forgot About Dre or The Nex Episode or Still D.R.E.... How about N.W.A?

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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by Company_man on Mon Aug 24, 2009 12:16 pm

Yeah he definately up there...same here,it keeps getting pushed back tho fuckin piss take lol mines is probably xxplosive,bitch niggaz or the watcher.
N.W.A are the shit,Straight outta compton,Gangsta gangsta and always into somethin are my favourite tunes from them you?
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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by KingCon on Mon Aug 24, 2009 12:19 pm

And most of the song that were meant to be on it has been sold of to 50 Cent... He needs to just hurry up and bring it out. But it wont be any where near as good as 2001 Chronic... For me it's either Fuck tha Police, Express yourself or Eazy Duz it. Do you like 2pac and Biggie?

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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by Company_man on Mon Aug 24, 2009 12:25 pm

It has to be good if its taking this long but your right it won't be as good as 2001...Yeah I like Biggie & Pac I got all of Bigs albums,nearly all of Pacs too Its a hard choice picking whos the better out of them lol
You like Snoop?
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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by KingCon on Mon Aug 24, 2009 12:28 pm

I think it's 2Pac... Hands down.
I've got to get alot of them....
I like alot of his stuff but only the really hardcore gangsta rap other-wise not really.

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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by Company_man on Mon Aug 24, 2009 12:35 pm

Hmm im not sure Pacs gotta be the realest and truest but Biggies too witty and hardcore,its tie for me..
Yeah I only really like his 90s stuff with Dre and the dogg pound
Eazy E was class as well..
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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by KingCon on Mon Aug 24, 2009 4:05 pm

What? They are both legends... But 2Pac's much better....
90's rap is the best.
Eazy E was pure class... He died far to young.. Him and Dre to gether were an amazing team.

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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by Company_man on Wed Aug 26, 2009 11:35 am

lol
Definately was, what type of 90s hip hop you like?West-coast or east-coast?
He was wasn't he... Shouldn't have died that young.. him & dre made up before he died, would've been good to see NWA back while he was still living..
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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by KingCon on Wed Aug 26, 2009 12:44 pm

I mainly like West-Coast... But I still like other rap.
AIDS was'nt it? I know there can't be a renunion without Eazy.... And I don't think Ice Cube would do it now anyway he's an actor.

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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by Company_man on Wed Aug 26, 2009 3:00 pm

Yeah im kinda the same more of an East-coast tho.
Aye it was.Chin Check (the song from Next Friday) was kind of a reunion but it wasn't the same without Eazy,I mean Snoops cool but he ain't no Eazy E.Yeah thats true..and Dj Yellas a porn director now so I don't know if he would either lol
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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by KingCon on Thu Aug 27, 2009 6:58 am

Is he? Good for him what about MC Ren? So Dre is the only one still in the game? I'll have to check that out. Did'nt know that they did that with Snoop.

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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by Company_man on Thu Aug 27, 2009 7:31 am

Rens got a new album coming out the end of this year or the start of next year I think...Dres the only one making some big money now what with Eminem and 50 cent being on his label.I fucking hate 50 cent lol
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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by KingCon on Thu Aug 27, 2009 7:34 am

Really I didn't know he was still in the game... Cool.. And he really is making some BIG bucks. But he's worth every penny. Smile I know what you mean one or two of his songs are okay but the rest... How about Lil Wayne and The Game.

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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by Company_man on Thu Aug 27, 2009 7:39 am

He is,his production's out of this world theres not many as good as him...Get rich or die trying was his best album he kind of went pop after that..The games great,im not too keen on Lil Wayne tho, u?
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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by KingCon on Thu Aug 27, 2009 8:24 am

Noone is as good as him... He makes beats and shit for basically everyone. I don't know what the album I like is...
The game's best stuff was the documentary he was gonna call it Nigga with Attitude V.1 but Eazy's wife stopped it. I like 3 little Wayne songs.

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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by Company_man on Thu Aug 27, 2009 8:30 am

Thats true most rap albums usually have at least one Dre track on them.Documentrys good,L.A.X is awesome too,thats one of the reasons him and Eazy E's son are beefing isn't it?
Mr Carter and Make it rain are the only ones I like of his..
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Re: Jokes!!!!!!

Post by KingCon on Thu Aug 27, 2009 8:34 am

Every Em song has Dre involved in some way...
Lil Eazy? I don't really keep up to date with whose argueing about what or why it's all been done before...
I like Mr.Carter and Let It Rock and Millie.

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